How to Stay Connected to Your Husband When You’re Trying to Conceive

By Brandi Jeter

Brandi works in partnership with First Response to share her pregnancy stories. This story was originally featured on her blog, Mama Knows it All.

When you’re having a tough time getting pregnant, being intimate and staying connected to your husband can be tough. I know. Terrence and I were trying to get pregnant with our son for a while before it finally happened. It was my second pregnancy and I had not anticipated it to be difficult. I was stressed out, anxious, and it totally affected our connection.

Trying to get pregnant sounds like it would be a lot of fun. And it was, until months and months went by and we still weren’t successful. That’s when the doubt and frustration started to seep in. I knew that if I wasn’t careful, Terrence and I could end up hating each other through the process of trying to conceive.

Fortunately, I had a strong group of women around me. They offered encouragement and ideas for staying close to my husband even through the difficult period of not getting pregnant. I implemented the following ideas to help spruce up my relationship and keep things exciting:

Go away together

A change of scenery can do wonders for the psyche when you’re trying to conceive. It helps you to relax and take your mind off the work of getting pregnant. My husband and I got a babysitter for our daughter and went to a wine country for the day. We came back to our empty home and spent quality time together, not worrying about babies and expanding our family, but enjoying each other’s company.

Be intentional about being intimate

Trying to conceive can be super stressful. When most of your lovemaking is scheduled around when you ovulate, it can resemble a chore. Look at your partner and remember why you’re attracted to them. Take time to snuggle in bed, send sweet text messages during the day, and create an anticipation for lovemaking.

Stop thinking about trying to pregnant

I know that this is easier said than done, but try to put getting pregnant out of your head. Be intimate with your partner because you’re in the mood regardless of what your fertility calendar says you need to do. Being intimate for the sake of being intimate, not only because you want to conceive can help you keep the connection alive. The FIRST RESPONSE™ Daily Digital Ovulation Test will help you know when you’re most fertile, so you can just focus on connecting and not have to wonder if this time is THE time.

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